Grubsheet cannot be alone in being concerned about the burgeoning frame of H.E the President, the Tui Macuata, Ratu Wiliame Katonivere, who has returned to Fiji after competing in the culinary olympics in Paris.
Even before he left for France, we were comparing H.E in his latest official portrait to a cream puff. But he has got even bigger since he was away, which suggests that he treated all those official dinners laced with goose fat and cream as an official marathon in which he has easily taken the gold medal.
This is not to make fun of the Head of State so much as to suggest to those around him that there is now a clear and present danger to his health. Judging from his Herculean girth ( Er, make that much bigger than Hercules), he is clearly a prime candidate for a heart attack or stroke. So let’s hope he is on a full course of blood pressure and cholesterol medication or he is at risk of dropping dead on us, like so many others in public life over the years.
It is not just the President’s own welfare that’s at issue here. Fiji’s has the highest per capita incidence of NCDs in the world, record levels of diabetes, record amputations in our hospitals and many young people whose idea of nutrition doesn’t go much beyond a Big Mac and a Coke. (Though the latter is evidently being increasing supplemented by “coke” of another sort)
As Head of State, His Excellency needs to set an example to the nation. We all understand that he probably can’t help the way he is to a greater or lesser extent. But sending him to Paris has been a disaster in putting on a lot more life-threatening kilos and an urgent intervention is needed.
Ratu Wiliame needs to get on his bike like the late King of Tonga, Tupou IV, when his weight got out of control. Even trying to shed some kilos – as King Tupou did – would send a message to tens of thousands of Fijians in the same position that they need to do something about it. So for the President, this is not a cause for shame but to cheerfully acknowledge a problem and start setting an example for the rest of the nation.
Unless, of course, the Coalition has put the President on the gravy train deliberately in the hope of triggering a state funeral as soon as possible. They’d obviously much prefer to have one of their own people in the job rather than a former president of FijiFirst, who is falling over backwards to accomodate them but still can’t be genuinely trusted.
Given the Coalition’s urgent desire to change the Constitution, we can just imagine them trying to install the Qaranivalu and instigator of the 2000 Mutiny, Ratu Inoke Takiveikata, as President. He is just the man for the job, having said that the chiefs and not parliament should be the ultimate power in the country.
And Ratu Inoke is lean and mean, as opposed to Ratu Wiliame who is, er, well lunched and not nearly mean enough. Otherwise he would be saying something about the outrageous breaches of the Constitution under the Coalition. Between mouthfuls, of course.
Note: To those who might accuse Grubsheet of throwing stones from a glass house, I might be well lunched but I am not the Head of State. And whether I drop dead is neither here nor there.
Before Paris:
When Grubsheet asked whether these two were perchance related…
After Paris and all that goose fat and cream.
He needs to get on his bike, like the late King of Tonga….
Or are they lining up the lean and mean Qaranivalu to be H.E ? (to the left of the Grinning Assassin.)
The perils of French restaurants are well known…
I think based on the recent appointments by this government, the Qaranivalu has all the ‘right’ qualifications and is the ideal person with his chiefly title for the job of H. E. the President having been convicted and serving more than a decade behind bars.
There is no one more suitable – except perhaps the Speaker. He also has the right qualifications and experience having participated in the insurrection at the Army Barracks in Labasa and also having served some time albeit very brief. But what is important is Fiji has unlimited supply of suitable idiots for the job.
You forgot to mention that the Qaranivalu ran his vehicle into Suva Harbour while drink driving and was luckily rescued after the 2000 coups. He also does not like the vulagi. So that gives him added qualifications and character to be ideal person for President.
But, importantly, that was all in the past!!!!
Getting onto the slow bicycle lane is a great suggestion. Now we have the dedicated lanes on the multi-million dollar QE Drive which should be put to good use. Others should be encouraged to do the same.
It is also a way of reducing our carbon footprint. Remember the famous pictures of the then Climate Champion, Inia Seruiratu riding a bike in Bonn in 2018 during Fiji’s Presidency. I am not sure if he has done it since then (I certainly haven’t seen him around much ever since he parted ways with the tinted airconditioned 4WD Pajero) but cycling could be a practical way of reinforcing messages on climate change, NCDs and our decadent development pathways.
He looks more like a babakau or a custard pie than a cream puff. I can never write seriously when it comes to political clowns.
Bloke looks like hes swallowed half the pastries in Paris and then come back to finish it off by eating an entire Hot Bread Kitchen…
That was uncalled for Sailor man! LOL!!! Lest the hot bread kitchen fella sues you as he did his dear old mother. Cranky lot. At least they kept the hostages alive for 56 days at veiuto. Proved once and for all that men can indeed live on bread alone.
Well you have an oversteamed dumbling coming back from China soon!
With a shrivelled shrimp to boot!
I could bet my native lease farm that the Chinese have a firm grip of the snake’s balls except TLTB won’t allow to profit in any way.
BTW, do snakes have balls? Dunno for sure, so there’s that pesky matter of not covering my over/under spread.
He is trying to grow into those emirates and Singapore airlines first class suites
It’s gross.
No he is naturally built like that.
Chief of a clan back those days during cannibalism was one who was big and strong .
One who would kill anyone who crossed their way.
That’s the reason you can’t cross straight in front of a chief as a tradition these days and have to bow your head down.
I don’t respect the chiefs of Fiji. They should be given a kick.
After he was appointed Fiji’s president back than by FFP government ,members of FFP went for a visit.
Aiyaz and Ratu Willie hugged each other.
I thought Aiyaz might have a stiff or broken neck but he survived.
Bull ma Cow
Just a fancy way of saying the same shit in a different way.
Nice to be a President and most obese too. Such a great role model.
Keep up.
He’s unable to walk in Parliament without huffing and puffing. This really is a dire situation. If he is built that way why is he getting bigger by the day and unable to breathe properly when he walks.
The president of Fiji should be dragged through the sugarcane fields of Fiji and made to cut sugarcane forever. That will put him back in shape. At a time when ordinary Fijians are starving and struggling to earn enough to buy food in this day of rising cost of living, the president is happily filling himself with food.
PM having a happy ending in China with Lin Da, HE President is wallowing under enormous pressures of public life as State Leader. So for comfort? It’s to the pots. This is not a good sign or image for many of our fellow countrymen who are struggling with obesity. Where are his advisors? Are they afraid of being eaten alive or what? What a bunch of cronies our leaders have around them. GD, can you send a memo to Dr Faktaufon or Dr Makaround? What are they doing?
Wake-up call for HoS’ medical team including the Minister for Health.
GS’ post demonstrates media freedom and independence at work at his end. However, due to fear and sensitivities of various types, his non-independent local counterparts will just wait for THE event. And when that happens, A/CJ will become A/HoS, drag all outstanding constitutional obligations like the tribunal for Chris, promptly clear constitutional violations, could release George, pave the way for Qaranivalu etc. So further mess.
Who knows, HoS could be on his way back to Paris for Paralympics 2024 next week. If true, then even more mess.
By the way, of the recent US Presidents, Trump was the only one who did not publicly release details of his state of health. Biden did. Ours? Never ever! We simply wait for the “event”.
The Orange convicted felon ferret head is so healthy that he could live to 200 years! So said his doctor.
The Orange convicted felon also refused to release his tax records.
And the Orange ferret head convicted felon is saying he looks better than-is prettier than the lady candidate.
Funny and weird guy, the Orange-6 times bankrupted, sex offender, and 34 times convicted felon.
Someone had lodged a sexual assault complaint against him not long ago. What happened?
Looks like he ate the complaint and made it disappear!
It was a sexual harassment complaint. And yes, whether he ate it or not, it was made to going away.
The women head honchos Gordon Street steered clear of those complaints even though one was made directly with them. Much ado about nothing they said.
The sheer gall of women to file these complaints! Misplaced hope and all. The head honchos of Gordon Street have bigger fish to fry – attend important conferences, have media freedom parties, engage in politics, support women abusers, sexual deviant misiter and and weed and bonking minister, and so on and so forth.
I believe that in future, all public figures who go overseas on the public purse should have their weight taken at the Immigration Departure lounge and again at Immigration arrival lounge upon their return and this should be held on public record. Anyone who has put on more than 1 kg should be fined instantly. The fine should be $10 per gram. That will be a disincentive to indulge whilst overseas.
Fiji now has this “culture” of cake cutting for all occasions. There is always an excuse for cake cutting. We see it all the time. Combined with the salusalu and the kalavata not to mention the reels of cloth to wrap things such as dinghys and cars and trucks which are given by government or as a charity presentation. And they decorate stages with this cloth as well. Looks very Third World. I guess they have to maintain their Third World status somehow. It is an embarrassing culture that has been taken up with a lot of passion by the natives. And I thought they did not like things vulagi! Where did this culture come from? Or has it been there since Adam was a little boy?
My point is, this “culture” of cake eating should stop immediately or the whole country will go the way of H. E.
Awe f…k S we say Fiji.
That pic of Fat Willy the gloat, really cracked me up!!
Man I couldn’t stop kaila(ing), laughing laughing, laughing and laughing!!
Folks at home began to wander what had gone wrong with me. Did you just smoke a joint, one asked.
Then I showed them that pic of Fat Willy…the Face of Fiji!!
The kaila after that just didn’t seem to end…every bowl of kava enhanced the session we had..thank’s GD.